Your Own Hero
Be honest, the last time you cried yourself to sleep - wishing someone would come rescue you, wishing it could all just be over - wasn’t the first time. It probably wasn’t the second, third, or fourth time you had those desperate, frantic, dark thoughts either. Which is why I say that in those lowest, weakest, most heartbreaking moments, you are actually at your strongest. Hear me out. You haven’t been rescued. No knight in shining armor has come and slayed a dragon for you, no angel has swooped down and carried you away from your fears, you haven’t won the lottery, you haven’t suddenly woken up to find that your sufferings were only a nightmare. Nope. YOU held yourself together. YOU pulled yourself out of your depression. You dragged yourself out of bed, dealt with your problems, tamed your demons, knocked out your to-do list, gave yourself a pep talk and got a smile to warm your face. Over and over again, you have saved yourself. Yes, the support, stability, love and care of those around you - friends, family, therapists, etc - have helped you. They have served as armor, as weapons, as comforting blankets and rejuvenating nutrients for your tired mind. But you are the warrior. And you have been your own hero many, many times. Remember that, next time you feel hopeless, next time you feel low. Remember that you’ve pulled yourself through to a brighter tomorrow before, and you will again. Remember that your life goes on. Good and bad and everything in between is shaping you into the most beautiful version of yourself that you can be. I know it’s cliche, but it’s true: a masterpiece takes days, months, even years to complete. Don’t sell yourself short, don’t chide yourself for not being perfect. You’re still learning! and growing! And in the mean time - in the day to day - you should be applauding yourself for the strength you’ve shown by getting back on your feet after being crumpled on the floor weighted down with sorrow, and taking pride in the strides you’ve made toward mental and emotional health. There will be awful nights and days of struggle, there will be mornings spent screaming into your pillow and afternoons spent weeping in your shower. But you will get through. You will smile again. How do I know? You’ve already proved you can.
